28 3 / 2014
This will be one of the hundred times I wanted to start over. Clean the mess. I will calculate everything and I visualize how it will all be. There are many things I want to do, like being happy and healthy. Being positive and cheering. Give love and be loved in return.
I have changed a lot from who I used to be. I know I have to overcome this and this is my journey to become who I was but then with a much richer experience. I know all that. Still, it is hard because I feel like that I was better in the past. I feel like I am no good. Everything I stand for is gone.
They say I have to accept who I am now. But well if I accept who I am now I will end up not changing at all. That terrifies me the most. Well a lot terrifies me lately. Everything is starting to terrify me. I am afraid of things wich had happened in the past.
I am going now. Till next time!
A lot of love,
I will start over
23 3 / 2014
Sex is not a goddamn performance.
Sex should feel as natural as drinking water.
It should not require confidence.
Sex should happen, because the moment is ripe.
Ripening lips, ripening labia, ripening cock, ripening pupils, ripening state of being. Ripe and augmented and brimming. Your energy goes to your pumping heart, then to every external nerve, then to theirs, on fire.
You bask, roll, play in it. You sigh, moan, laugh.
It’s not about being “good in bed.”
It’s about being happy.
One should never worry if they’re doing it “correctly.” Sex is not factual. I don’t want your cookie-cutter sex, I don’t want your meticulously crafted, calculated, fool-proof fuck. I don’t want a show. I want you. Let your instincts, urges and whims define that. It’s enough.
What do most girls like? Forget about it. Statistics are meaningless when there’s only one. Hello, here’s me. Here’s you.
Don’t worry about taking it too slow. We got time. We got infinite rhythms, combinations, possibilities. Explore each fuck. Take our time. We can do a different one later.
Don’t worry about making me come. I’m here. Right where I want to be.
I am overwhelmed by wanting; you don’t have to convince me. I want you because I like you. So don’t put on a front. Don’t taint this.
I’m frustrated—it’s just authenticity I want.
Don’t say that something I like is ugly. Don’t compare yourself to the rest. You will live and die with and within your experiences like everyone else. If someone thinks you are amazing, they are not wrong. Their universe is as real as any other; it is forged through perception.
I don’t care if you accidentally slammed my head into the wall, if you slipped out, if my arm cracked, if the delightful pressure of your wet lips on my anything made a silly sound. There is no right way and no wrong way.
“Good in bed,” what.
You’re good in my bed. I’m pleased you’re there. I feel it suits you.
Shove your technique. Let your memory swallow it. Fuck me like you’d fuck me, fuck me like you feel.
This isn’t a test."
14 1 / 2014
25 9 / 2013
You are the sky. Everything else - it’s just the weather. - Pema Chodron
03 9 / 2013
To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself. - Jon Kabat-Zinn
05 8 / 2013
But I had noticed that most witches were more peaceful to be around than most regular people. It was as if witches recognized the value of silence—-they didn’t see a lack of noise as a vacuum that needed to be filled.
26 7 / 2013
"She thought it must be a lonely life for a boy who hated books."
15 6 / 2013
12 6 / 2013
I hated every minute of training, but I said, ‘Don’t quit. Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion. - Muhammad Ali
25 4 / 2013
"As a single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives."